A few days ago, I was talking to a friend who’s in the throes of a particularly nasty quarter-life crisis. She doesn’t know what she wants to be when she grows up (she’s 28), she has no idea what her purpose is, and she feels completely paralyzed. She asked me if I know what I want to do with my life. “Yes,” I told her, “I’m going to be a bestselling novelist.” She paused (a long pause, I might add) and said, “Don’t you think you’re setting your sights too high? I mean, shouldn’t you start with a short story or a magazine article?”

Um… Hell, no!

I don’t fault my friend for not being supportive. For one thing, she’s going through a very tough time right now, and for another, most people are terrified of big goals. Think about it. Wouldn’t you be a bit taken aback if your neighbor told you with a straight face that she was going to find a cure for cancer, or win the Boston Marathon, or become an astronaut, or be an Oscar-winning director? Your response might start with “Yeeeeaaaaah, but…” I’m guilty of doing this, too. Why are we so quick to discount the dreams of “ordinary” people?

Here’s the thing–no one is a born virtuoso. It’s all of matter of exposure, opportunity, and hard work. When I say exposure, I mean to ask–what would Mozart have become if no one had ever shown him a piano? What would Martin Scorsese be if he had never seen a movie? At some point, you have to be exposed to something that ignites your passion. This is why it’s so important to make a diligent effort to find your purpose–it might be something you’ve never been exposed to, and you won’t find it if you don’t look.

As for opportunity and hard work, the two go hand in hand. Remember Jewel, the singer? Lucky girl, right? Probably had a pretty nice life since she made it big in the late 90s. Well, it didn’t start out that way. She grew up in Alaska in a house with no indoor plumbing (outhouse in Alaska? Brrr!). In high school, she learned to yodel and play guitar, and she started writing songs at 17. For a few years, she lived in her van doing street performances and playing small clubs. But she kept putting herself out there, creating opportunities to get noticed, and working hard, and you know what? She made it. I bet her high school classmates laughed their asses off when she said she was going to be a famous singer one day. I bet they’re not laughing now.

So go ahead, think big. Set your sights as high as you can dream. What’s your impossibly huge goal? Leave a comment & let me know–I promise, I won’t laugh.

Day 14 is done–one week to go!

This post was included in the Personal Development Carnival at The Next 45 Years. Stop by to check out all the great articles!

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