The past couple of weeks have been a real whirlwind. My team at work has been simultaneously short-staffed and over-tasked, which has resulted in stress, long hours, stress, frustration, stress, missed workouts, stress, not cleaning the house, and stress. On top of that, I’ve got two websites to write for–Semi-Charmed Wife, which as you all know, has been woefully neglected of late, and the Examiner.

My husband and I have obligations/plans for the next four weekends, which gives me little time to recuperate/catch up/regain a tenuous relationship with my sanity and means that I have to squeeze all of my writing into the few hours between the time I get home from work and the time I go to sleep. As you can probably imagine, sitting at the computer is EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO DO after a long, stressful day at work of sitting at the computer.

(Note: It is exactly THE OPPOSITE of what I want to do, which is de-stress and/or sleep.)

Then there’s that whole pregnant thing. Yeah. Apparently, it makes me a wee bit emotional/hormonal, not to mention that I could easily sleep 16 hours a day if I were allowed to do so. And I’m a bit worried. I’ve lost some weight over the past few weeks (not much–just a few pounds), which my doctor assures me is totally normal for the first trimester, but I can’t help but wonder if the constant stress of the pressure cooker that is my life might have something to do with it.

My husband and I talked, and I’ve come to the conclusion that–contrary to what I want to believe–I can’t keep going at this breakneck pace right now. It’s not good for me, and I can’t imagine it’s good for the baby.

I’m going to talk to my editor at the Examiner and see if I can cut back to posting 1-2 times per week. Seeing as she just emailed me to request that I start posting every day (I’ve been posting 4x/week and am only obligated to post 3x/week), I have serious doubts as to whether she’ll agree to my request. If she doesn’t, as much as I’d hate to, I think I’ll have to resign. The alternative would be giving up Semi-Charmed Wife, and I get too much joy/inspiration from it to even contemplate doing that.

Though I know that this decision is in my best interests, I hate being in this position. It’s hard to admit that I can’t do something, and I’m struggling not to feel like a quitter. Again, I know intellectually that I’m doing the right thing, but emotionally, it’s a different story.

Have you ever been in a similar situation? How did you handle it? I need advice!

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I and–I feel fairly confident making this assumption–many of my readers tend to take on too much. At any given moment, we’re juggling the demands of our primary job, perhaps an extra or freelance gig or two, our families, our friends and social lives, our marriages or relationships, our health and fitness, our hobbies, and our churches, charities, or volunteer organizations. Our plates are pretty darn full. Sometimes, we just don’t know when to say when.

Your husband (partner/friend/family member/coworker) may ask, as mine has of late, why don’t you just not do some of this stuff?

To which I reply by chucking my overstuffed day planner at him, laughing maniacally, and running off into the sunset. (Note to men: This is NOT what you should say to your overworked, overstressed wife who is balancing a full-time job, a part-time job–my Examiner page, which launched yesterday, a website, and an overpacked social calendar ALL WHILE BUILDING A HUMAN. I’m just saying, word to the wise.)

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My husband and I had a plan for the next few years. It was a good plan. It had us paying off all of our debts (including my student loans), aggressively saving for retirement, and setting aside enough cash for a 20% down payment on the home of our dreams, AND it left room for a few dream vacations–New Year’s in Argentina, a trip to the Dominican Republic with my best friend, and a cruise to Alaska.

God, I loved that plan.

And then…

Then…

Something unexpected happened* (something wonderful, but earth-shattering) that has totally shifted our priorities, rendering our perfect, amazing plan irrelevant given our new circumstances. Continue Reading »

Most Americans, regardless of their personal religious choices, have grown up under the influence of the Puritan Work Ethic (or Protestant Work Ethic). According to Wikipedia, the PWE emphasizes the necessity of constant labor and diligent work in order to attain grace and salvation. After all, idle hands are the devil’s playthings…

In more modern, secular terms, hard work (and I don’t know about you, but I think of “work” as something I don’t enjoy and don’t necessarily want to do) is the key to happiness and financial success. No pain, no gain, right? Many of us believe that we are so fundamentally undeserving that we must earn our happiness and success through blood, sweat, and tears. (This doesn’t really make sense when you look at the world around you, does it? How many people do you know who’ve worked hard all their lives and are neither happy nor financially successful?)
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“Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” - John Wayne

 
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I’ve been thinking a lot about fear and how it affects my life. Fear of failure has been holding me back for years from trying to earn a living as a writer. The most maddening thing is that acknowledging the fear and realizing that it’s holding me back doesn’t make the fear go away. As much as my heart wants to quit my job and go for it, my fear STILL controls me. As you might image, I find this situation completely unacceptable.
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