On Monday, I posted about feeling like I’m not living the life I’m supposed to lead. I got quite a few emails from readers who feel the same way. It’s a frustrating feeling, isn’t it? It’s this nagging sensation that something’s not right, that you’re somehow being robbed of experiences you should be having and satisfaction you should be feeling. I’ve been thinking about that feeling and what I can do to change it pretty much constantly since I wrote that post.

It seems that many of you are frustrated because you not only feel like you’re not living the life you’re supposed to lead, but you also don’t have a clue as to what that life might be. I share your frustration. I have some ideas about what the life I’m supposed to lead might include–teaching, writing, helping people, broadcasting my “you can do it!” message–but I don’t know exactly what that life looks like. It’s like I can see the fuzzy outline of it, but I can’t make out any of the details. Argh! How am I supposed to make it happen if I can’t see what “it” is??

This whole inner dialogue made me realize that it’s really important to have a dream. Daydreaming might not strike you as a personal/career development exercise, but it is. It helps us identify what’s important to us, what’s missing from our lives, what we’d like to change, who we’d like to be, what we’d like to do, etc. Daydreaming will help you build a detailed picture of the life you’re supposed to lead which will, in turn, help you identify actions you can take to get there.

Take a few minutes some time today and let yourself daydream about your perfect life. What are you doing? Where do you live? Who are you with (personally and professionally)? Where do you work? (For example, in my personal daydream, I see my husband and I owning a REAL HOUSE–not a condo–with a yard. I work from home on this website and other writing projects, including a book. You get the idea.) Let your imagination run wild, and see where it takes you.

What is your dream? Are there any actions you can take to support it?

Thank God, the Universe, and Whoever Else that it’s Friday!!!

I’m a bit crampy and a lot headachey, and I’m officially taking a day off from serious, topical posts. I still feel like writing something though, so I’m shamelessly borrowing Zandria’s Random Friday idea. Enjoy!

1. My husband and I are getting together with friends tonight and cooking Mexican food. I’m in charge of bringing beer, guacamole, and fish tacos. True story: I thought that “fish taco” was a euphemism for female anatomy until I was in my late 20s. I blame the Navy.
2. We’re going to see Wanted, the new Angie Jo/James McAvoy flick tomorrow. It sounds like it’s right up my alley. In my opinion, a good movie contains (1) multiple car chases; (2) physics-defying special effects; and (3) at least one explosion. I like my movies loud and improbable. My least favorite movies are (1) chick flicks; (2) anything with Meg Ryan and/or Nicholas Cage–they both inexplicably annoy the bejesus out of me; and (3) sad and/or “heartwarming” movies (I cry at the drop of a hat as it is–I don’t need any additional provocation. This heart is warm enough, thankyouverymuch).
3. I love love LOVE my personal trainer, Donald. He’s not intimidating. He pushes me without being mean. He understands that running always has and always will come first to me and designs my workouts accordingly. I got so lucky when the gym assigned him to me!
4. I was a smoker through my late teens and early twenties. (I was in the Navy and everyone smoked. I figured that I might as well smoke because at least I’d have a filter in my mouth. The logic of a 19-year old.) I still smoke 3-4 cigarettes per week–psychological need more than physical at this point, but NO MORE. I am casting off the chains of oppression and going totally smoke-free. Viva clean lungs!
5. It’s 9:49am as I write this, and I am STARVING. Is it too early for lunch?

What random tidbits are on your mind today?

I’m taking Janssen’s lead and copying the “My Town” feature from Real Simple where residents of a city talk about what to see, do, and eat in their hometown. Janet is collecting the answers and creating a page of personalized city recommendations. You should play along!

My DC

Age: 30.

Occupation: Defense contractor.

I’ve lived here for: Five years.

I live here because: I wanted to study international security and work for the U.S. government, and this is kind of the best place to do that.

My neighborhood: Capitol Hill.

My favorite restaurant: Granville Moore’s. The chef is a friend of mine & he’s going to be on Throwdown with Bobby Flay on July 8. Check it out on the Food Network!

If you go to this restaurant, be sure to order: The blue cheese & bacon mussels and fries. Best. Fries. EVER.

My favorite museum: The Smithsonian Institution National Museum of Natural History.

My favorite tourist destination: The National Zoo.

Best insider spot: H Street.

My favorite area: Eastern Market.

Best place to go shopping: Georgetown. There are a ton of shops and restaurants–it’s a great way to spend an afternoon.

When you visit, don’t forget to pack: Comfortable shoes. With all the museums and shopping, you’ll be on your feet a lot!

But leave room in your suitcase for: Cheesy DC tourist items like “Friends Don’t Let Friends Vote Republican” T-shirts and CIA hats.

The one local cuisine you should try when you’re in town is: Ethiopian food. Seriously–it’s everywhere and it’s awesome.

The best way to get around: Metro or walking.

If I had to describe this city in one word, it would be: Intense. The politics are intense. The heat/humidity is intense (if you can help it, avoid DC in July & August). The tourist crowds are intense. The traffic is absolutely INSANE.

I tell my friends to stay at: The Phoenix Park Hotel. It’s about a 15-minute walk from my apartment, and it’s right by Union Station which has Metro, buses, and Amtrak.

The one thing most outsiders don’t know about this city is: Almost no one is actually from here, and the population is turning over all the time due to people who work on the Hill, military folks, and college students. Pretty much everyone I know moved here in the last 5 years and won’t still be here in 5 years.

They say “Virginia is for lovers.” So fill in the blank: DC is for career-driven people. In New Orleans, they ask you what you drink. In Boston, they ask you who your father is. In DC, the only question is “what do you do?”.

Janssen’s addition: What do you want to do that you haven’t done in your city yet? Go to the National Archives to see the Constitution. I can’t believe I haven’t found time for that in FIVE YEARS.

Kelli tagged me for this meme, 15 Years in a Nutshell. Enjoy!

Think back on the last 15 years of your life. What would you tell someone that you hadn’t seen or talked to for 15 years? Write a list of 10 things to summarize your life. At the end of your list, tag 5 more people and send on the love.

1. I partied waaaaay too much as a teenager. I got caught with alcohol several times during my freshman year and got kicked out of school and sent to rehab. I met a 29-year old drug addict (I was 17) in group therapy. Of course, I married him. As you might imagine, it didn’t work out. Divorced by age 20…
2. I joined the Navy as a nuclear propulsion mechanic (yet I still can’t change my own oil).
3. I spent two years abroad–one studying Comparative Religion and Culture throughout Asia and one studying political science in China–for my undergrad degree (double major in Peace & Conflict Resolution and Mandarin Chinese). 
4. I got a Master’s degree in International Affairs. I worked full-time for the government and took full-time evening classes. It was horrible. I barely remember those two years of my life.
5. I dated a very sweet Catholic boy for almost a year. We broke up because he decided that he wanted to be a priest. Seriously.  
6. My niece, Jennifer (Jenna) Joy–yes, she’s named after me and yes, I cried–was born on March 22, 2007.  She is the smartest, most beautiful, most advanced, most wonderful, and possibly screamiest baby ever.
7. I found out I had the BRCA2 gene mutation. With my family history (every female relative on my mother’s side either has, has had, or died of breast cancer) my doctors decided to do a double masectomy.
8. I had a hideous allergic reaction to painkillers after the first surgery and had to do the second one with nothing but TYLENOL. That sucked. But I did get a pretty nice C cup out of the whole thing… 
9. I married my sweetheart, the love of my life, on December 1, 2007.
10. I started my website in January 2008, and it’s been one of the best things I’ve ever done. It’s started me on a journey to find my purpose in this world, and it has connected me with a wonderful network of women that inspire and motivate me every day!

If you participate in the meme, leave a comment so we can swing by and check out your answers!

In other news, it was a hectic weekend and I’m a bit frazzled. I’ll be back to regular posting tomorrow…

I’m driving up to Atlantic City for work today (yes, that’s right–your government has facilities in the gambling capital of the East Coast), so I’ll be offline until tomorrow morning. I’m actually excited about the drive–I’ve got Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth on my iPod (thanks for the recommendation, Kelli!) and I’m looking forward to “reading” on the way.

Have a great day!