I’m still mulling many of the issues that arose in my reading. The topic of labels has been on my mind today. Vera advised me to replace the negative labels I’ve given myself with positive labels. I’ve become pretty attached to some of my labels, so there’s some mental and emotional resistance I’ll need to overcome.

I’m kind of winging it here, but it seems like a logical starting place would be to identify my current labels and take a hard look at how they might impact my life. Then I’d need to choose new labels and integrate them into my understanding of myself through meditation, affirmations, visualization, or other methods.

• Fighter: Like I said in yesterday’s post, I think of myself as a fighter–someone who will never, ever give up. I think there are some positive aspects to this label, and I believe it served me well earlier in my life. However, now that I’m happily married, financially secure, and emotionally stable, I’m kind of like Don Quixote tilting at windmills. I think the label I’d like to replace this with is Adapter, someone who adjusts to her circumstances, is able to function in any environment, and is not dependent on the outside world to determine her experience of life.
• Survivor: Parts of my childhood were very difficult, and I had a really horrible first marriage. Like many women (unfortunately), I’ve dealt with sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse. I pulled myself from the brink of poverty and addiction. I survived. Again, this worked well for me in the past, but it doesn’t fit my life now. I don’t want to merely survive any more. Maybe a new label could be Celebrator, someone who lives every moment joyfully.
• Screwup: I lost a college scholarship because I partied too much. I married the wrong man and then couldn’t make it work. I couldn’t control my spending, eating, drinking, or really anything. I just couldn’t do anything right. This label is the source of my perfectionism, need to prove myself, negative self-talk, and unhealthy coping mechanisms. It has never been good for me, and it’s time for it to go! I’d like my new label to be Seeker. I may not know all the answers, but I’m looking for them…

I still need to do some more reflection and contemplation to identify other labels, but these three are the ones that have influenced me the most. I’m off to a strong start!

To follow up on my post yesterday, in which I questioned who/what I would be if I completely released my past, Vera shared her own experience with this process. She urged me to look back into the past, as far back as I can–who was the original Jen? Who was I before I was the Fighter, the Survivor, and the Screwup? That me, the Child-Jen, is much closer to my true spiritual Self than Fighter Jen. That is the past I want to hold onto, that original state of grace.

What labels do you need to discard, and what will you replace them with?

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