Comments on: More Tiny Changes

By: Kel

Kel — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 01:58:57 +0000

It took me a little bit to respond to this one. Saying the words “I forgive” is the first step, but actually letting myself forgive is a the next part. I have a history of saying “I forgive you” but secretly harboring resentment which only leads to guilt on my part. I spend so much of my time ‘covering up’ my real feelings because I think I want to forgive, but really I want to keep feeling bad.

This is all a learning process for me … so to start with I think I need to forgive myself.

By: leslie

leslie — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 17:47:50 +0000

this is a very raw and honest post and I think you’re brave for sharing your thoughts like this. You’re right - anger and grudges are such pointless emotions - like jealousy, all they do is rile us up and lead to arguments. Nothing positive really comes out except it lets us, in some way, feel like we’re “in the right.” I can’t write my list here because (a) it’s so personal and (b) I really need to think about it but I’ve got some ideas and let’s just say, three of them are on your list, too.

By: tulips4me

tulips4me — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:33:53 +0000

your raw honesty in this post is very compelling…thanks for giving me the gentle nudge i needed to start working on some things.

my parents didn’t teach me how to handle money responsibly, so obviously it’s their fault that i’m thousands of dollars in debt. my parents - mom, in particular, i think - somehow taught me that relationships with men were something to be ashamed of, so she’s to blame for the fact that i’ve never had a relationship that lasted more than 5 months (recent broken engagement included). and i’m not sure who’s to blame for my weight issues, but it certainly couldn’t be me!

oh dear…yes, there’s LOTS to work on!!

By: goodbyetoallfat

goodbyetoallfat — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:10:14 +0000

I guess I need to forgive all the bitchy classmates who made 3 years of my life at school very difficult (and one of whom pinched a job from me shortly after leaving school).

My current blog (all about said teenage bitchiness) probably makes it look as if I am very negative and angry, but that is not quite the case.

I have now a job that pays very well (even if not the one I originally intended) and I can see possibilities for myself beyond what any of those classmates, who are still stuck in a rut in their jobs, ever imagined I would achieve.

So perhaps there is a purpose to everything in life and it all happened for a reason.

By: Laynie

Laynie — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:01:11 +0000

Forgiveness is something I have been working on for years. I still have some work to do with certain people but there are a couple that I have made major improvements on, more than I thought I would at this point. Concerning my biological father, I still hold that grudge closely. It sneaks up on me sometimes that I should let that go but I fight it. I know I do this out of pride. I feel like if I forgive him and let him into my life then all he did to hurt me is washed away. And nothing he did can be made ok so therefore I can’t forgive him. Like I said, I am still working on this…

Thanks for such a personal post about your own demons.

By: Leah

Leah — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:11:11 +0000

Forgiving my parents for my childhood was huge for me. It really paved the way for the great relationships I have with them now.

Yeah, there are a few people I should forgive right now. I like the letter idea, as then I could get the thoughts that swim around my head from time to time out of my system. Don’t know if I’m ready though. I’ll have to chew on this.

Thanks for this post! It was very personal, so thank you for sharing the inside of yourself once again!

By: Cynthia

Cynthia — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 12:51:55 +0000

I’ll have to read her post.

I will have to do this exercise for myself because I’m struggling hard with the issue of forgiveness right now. Especially with all that is going on around me; I need to be reminded of this fact…quite often.

Hold onto guilt or anger brings you down, rarely the other person. Admitting, getting outside of your head and learning to come to grips with it is the only way that you’ll be able to set yourself free!