May 01 2008
Love. Self. Entirely: The View from Generation Y
Today’s post comes from Love. Self. Entirely., a relatively new discovery who has quickly become one of my favorite blogs. C. writes with passion and insight about issues ranging from procrastination to body image to self-destructiveness. If you haven’t checked out her website, go there now!! I’m very excited to present her perspective as a Gen Y-er about self-esteem and the “Me” generation. Enjoy!
From all of the articles that I’ve read, it seems that I belong to Generation Y–a generation known somewhat for being hardworking, but more for being needy narcissists with a materialistic bent.
Most of you probably noticed how generalized and simplistic that assessment of an entire generation of people sounds, but I’ve noticed while researching material for this topic that countless articles seemed to focus their entire thesis on similar thoughts or statements. Some people might fit this broad, sweeping characterization, but I’m confident that you will find people that embody these same type of traits across many generations. The notion that this is primarily what we (Gen Y) are known for amuses me.
Part of me wonders if it’s more of a cultural generalization than a generational one. I grew up in a small town in the suburbs of Maryland. I was the oldest child of a middle class, black family. My parents didn’t give me everything I wanted. I had an allowance that was taken away if I misbehaved. I had periods of being grounded. I was spanked (I deserved it) when I acted disrespectful. Still, most would say my brother and I were levelheaded kids compared to some of the others that we knew.
If I did something exemplary like get straight A’s, I got the token “Good Job”, but no one threw me my own personal parade. “Praise” wasn’t a well-known word in the Wright household, and I can’t say if I’m better or worse because of it. What I’m trying to say is that I had to work for everything–nothing was handed to me on a silver platter–and I never expected to be acknowledged for every good thing that I did.
As I stated above, I was minimally praised while I was growing up; more often than not I was criticized. I was never good enough–someone or something was always bigger or better than me, not to mention that I had no one to look up too because it seemed no one looked like me. That instilled in me the drive to succeed and prove to everyone (but more to myself) that I could stand on my own and that I wasn’t what everyone perceived me to be. I had the street smarts, the intellectual savvy, and the beauty to combat anything and win or at least give it my best shot. I didn’t grow up believing that the world owed me something because I was born or because I was smart. I realized from the beginning that I had to prove myself in this life.
I know plenty of people in Generation Y who are more like me. We don’t buy into the entitlement hype. We get out there and we work, even if we aren’t particularly pleased about our current job situation. We moved away from our parent’s nest early or right after college, and we paid for our own clothes, cars, and housing. We take care of ourselves. We realize that life is not going to be a walk in the park–we know that you have to learn to combat and roll with life’s challenges.
But where are the statistics representing Gen Y-ers like me? Why don’t they refer to us and discuss the very real issues that we deal with?
Take me for example. I’ve suffered from an eating disorder since I was 9 years old. I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t made fun of for being heavy. Even now that I’m 20 pounds from my goal weight, I struggle still. The only way I knew for people to show how much they cared about me was to walk all over me, and I was afraid to stand my ground because I didn’t want them to leave. I’ve researched the information out there about Generation Y and, unless I searched specifically for it, it was hard for me to find information concerning the increasing prevalence of eating disorders, particularly within minority groups.
No one wants to talk about that.
Why do people only tend to address the esteem issues when something catastrophic happens (i.e. Columbine or Virginia Tech)? Then, the low self-esteem of Gen Y is recognized. But in normal situations, countless articles reducing the character identity of Generation Y to a bunch of whiners, who (even though they DO hard work) have to be pacified constantly in order to be satisfied.
In order to be fair and thorough, people have to address all aspects of an issue, but I feel that most of the articles that discuss Generation Y seem to lack overall balance. Perhaps more of us than in prior generations have more self-esteem, but as media-driven as our society has become, I believe our focus should be shifted onto how the images and messages of the media have impacted this generation. If we focus on what needs to be changed instead of what currently exists, maybe the issues this generation is grappling with so painfully can be more successfully dealt with by the next.
Or, I’d like to hope so, anyway.
Table of contents for Self-Esteem Week
Great post! I grew up much more like you, so the entitlement thing usually offends me. I do see plenty of it in my peers, but I think there are so many more of us out there who grew up in a world affected by the recession of the 80’s, who had to pay our own way through college, who were pushed and pressured to be better than our parents, who had to work hard to get where we are. We don’t get noticed by the researchers because we are too busy working our butts off, the only way to work, according to the way we were raised. So we don’t have time to look up long enough to hear what’s being said about our generation, much less refute it.
Forgive me, but what age range is Generation Y? I don’t often pay attention to stereotypes, but I found your article interesting and want to do further research into this. As Leah, I grew up working hard, paying my own way through college and was pushed to do more and better for myself by hard-working parents.
I think it’s not a “Generation Y” thing, but rather a societal issue across the board ~ people are more interested in material items. We’re replacing time with family versus time with the TV. Outside activities are replaced with computer games. It’s not just a generation, it’s across the generations.
Am I supposed to post in here? I really don’t know if the blogosphere has a set a rules in regards to this.
Generation Y, the usual age average are those born from 1978 - 1995 (give or take a year or two). I personally didn’t know I was considered Generation Y (since I don’t follow these things at all) until I saw the articles posted on this site!
And I agree with you, I think scientists want to classify things in attempts at labeling it, instead of tackling WHAT is causing these changes across the generations!